Pity Party

Hi everyone...guess what? None of us are sick! Amazing I know. But we have had a rough start to our new year. It seems like it should be March by now...but I am sure February will fly by.

I went to Big Girls class today to teach about Penguins...we had a blast. Little man stayed with our good friend K, and sweet girl worked right with the other students. We did several experiments and an art project. I love being part of her class. We also invite the neighbor class to come over so I had 37 first graders today. Needless to say, I am exhausted!

I know you haven't heard from me in a while...Daddy says I'm having a pity party for myself...but to be honest, I am just a little frustrated and down. I know that my life is great...I mean look at where I was a year ago. I also try to remember where we were 6 years ago...and we have come a long way and have been so blessed. But I guess (being a human) I get a little selfish. Even though I have so much to be thankful for...I am frustrated at the things I don't have or that are not going my way. I don't really want to hear anyone tell me that I should be thankful and that thinking those thoughts is not the right way to look at things. I know all that. Yes, I know God is in control, and I know that reading my Bible and prayer are things I need to concentrate on...I am working on it! But the past few weeks have been rough. I will try to give you the short version.

Not to mention all the sickness that we have dealt with the past 2 months, but there are things going on in my heart and mind. (Again, I know that I need to trust God.) I wonder sometimes why we are where we are. Why are these people in my life right now? Why are people that were in my life a few years ago not here now? I am frustrated that my best friend has a family member sick and dealing with some health issues and I can't just pack up and go stay a week with her (miss you H). Sometimes, I will just sit and think about what I have in my life right now and wonder what more I could ask for more? Don't get me wrong...I am so thankful for what I have...I am just being selfish right now...thinking that I need more.

I need more time, more money, more stuff, more knowledge, more people...you get my meaning. I miss my family and get disappointed that so many of my friends here have family they can count on with help and important things. I miss my college friends and colleagues to talk science with. I even miss people that were in my life a year ago but have gotten too busy or too far away (you know who you are). The good part is that I have new people in my life.

So again I ask the questions...why are these people in my life now...is there any one I can count on without family here...what more do I need or want? A good friend today mentioned the same thing...and I realized on the drive home that people in my life right now need me as much as I need them. Isn't that great how God works! There are several people I can count on here and I don't really know what more I need. There are a few things I still might want (a fruitful garden is at the top of the list)...but I am perfectly content. I have a wonderful husband who is not only a friend, but a helper (thanks honey). I have 3 wonderful (sometimes loud) kids who have blessed our lives greatly. I have a fantastic family and in-laws that try to come when they can, and I have some amazing friends that are only a phone call away.

Someone told me once that God takes us through seasons, places certain people and circumstances in our lives to help us grow and follow his Will! And isn't that what we are striving for? To continue growing and learning and to be in his perfect and peaceful will!